Loving a Drug Addict
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Coming face to face with the harsh reality that you are in love with a drug addict is not easy. First, there is denial. Denial persists for as long as you manage to ignore the obvious signs of your partner’s addiction. Eventually, the symptoms take over and you must decide if loving a drug addict is something you’re willing to do. Let’s talk about it.
Signs You’re in Love with a Drug Addict
Addiction is a disease that impacts the brain and develops into compulsive substance seeking behaviors. Drug addiction can develop rapidly depending on the substance and how frequently the person uses it. When the drug addict is someone who you love, it poses a delicate and often frustrating dilemma. How to protect yourself while being supported of your partner?
Your partner may have succeeded in hiding their drug addiction for a good long time. The symptoms were not consistent enough or blatant enough to cause too much concern. As his or her addiction continued to deepen, the signs become unmistakable. Here are the classic signs of drug addiction:
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- As tolerance to the substance increases, so does consumption
- Neglects responsibilities and obligations
- Shows changes in appearance
- Goes doctor shopping for refills
- Withdraws from friends and family
- Prioritizes drug use, becomes focused on obtaining and using the drug
- Work or academic performance declines
- Continues to use drugs despite mounting consequences
- Has financial and legal problems due to addiction
- Experiences withdrawal symptoms
Challenges of Loving a Drug Addict
Loving an addict brings an assortment of challenges to the relationship that ultimately impact both partners. Here are some of the most common problems that occur when a partner is addicted to a substance:
- Personality changes. The substance abuse literally changes the person. Their whole personality goes through a transformation as they exhibit hostility, mood swings, apathy, irritability, and even aggression.
- Dishonesty. The partner will go to any extreme to hide or deny their drug abuse or addiction. This involves lying about their substance use, hiding the drugs and paraphernalia from you, and stealing money or other items.
- Manipulation. The addicted partner often becomes a master manipulator to defuse any resistance from others and continue their addiction. They use guilt, gaslighting, and rage to maintain control.
- Legal or financial fallout. If you live with or are married to the addict, you may be somewhat vulnerable to their legal problems and money problems. They may lose their job due to the addiction, which can have far-reaching and destabilizing consequences.
- Enabling. As the sober partner, you may find yourself covering for the addict and making excuses for them. As you put out their fires, you only enable their drug addiction and reduce the chances that they’ll seek treatment.
- Codependency. Codependent partners each play a role based on neediness. The sober spouse becomes so enmeshed in the addict’s disease and drama that they neglect their own health and wellness
- Isolation. When you are in a relationship with an addict, it is common to become isolated socially. This happens when your partners addiction is evident and you want to avoid scrutiny and embarrassment.
Prioritize Self-Love If Your Partner is a Drug Addict
One of the most damaging outcomes of loving a drug addict is the impact on your own wellbeing. If you choose to stay and be supportive, there are some important self-care actions to take:
- Set healthy boundaries. Establish healthy boundaries to protect yourself from manipulation, codependency, and enabling. Remind yourself that you cannot fix the addict, and that you only have control over yourself.
- Seek support. Loving a drug addict is exhausting and often demoralizing. Join a support group for family members, such as Al-Anon or Codependents Anonymous, and consider getting guidance from a therapist.
- Stay active. Being in a relationship with an addict can take a heavy toll on your own health. To avoid this, stick to a regular fitness routine like joining a gym or taking daily runs or walks.
- Stay connected. To maintain your own mental health, it is essential to stay connected to your friends and family members. Make a point of meeting up, having lunch, and engaging in frequent phone conversations.
Try an Intervention for the Addict
If your addicted loved one is not open to getting help, you may wish to plan an intervention. The intervention is planned and carried out by an addiction specialist. He or she will ask the participants (significant others) to write a letter to read aloud to the addict. In it, they will describe how their addiction has harmed or impacted their own life.
The addict is asked to meet at a specified location and time, where they will be joined by the participants. The goal of the intervention is to persuade the drug addict to accept help. They may not be open to rehab yet, but at least they are aware of how their addiction is harming those he or she loves.
Drug Addiction Treatment and Recovery
When your addicted partner does decide to accept treatment, this is what he or she can expect at rehab:
- Medical detox. The expert medically trained team guides your partner through detox while providing targeted medications to help manage withdrawal symptoms.
- Psychotherapy. These one-on-one talk therapy sessions with a licensed therapist are the centerpiece of addiction treatment. Therapies like CBT and DBT teach new ways to manage cravings and stressors.
- Group therapy. Small group sessions offer an opportunity to meet with peers in recovery and discuss various topics.
- Education. Addiction education provides important information about how drugs impact the brain and lead to compulsive substance abuse.
- Holistic therapies. Holistic methods, such as meditation, art therapy, grounding, and breath work, are activities that help reduce stress.
- Relapse prevention. Preparing the individual for recovery involves equipping them with relapse prevention tools. These include aftercare support, like medication-assisted treatment, sober living housing, outpatient treatment programs, and recovery support groups.
Annandale Behavioral Health Comprehensive Addiction Recovery Services
Annandale Behavioral Health is a luxury rehab that provides comprehensive treatment for drug abuse and addiction. Loving a drug addict is a difficult situation, but our residential treatment program can help turn him or her around. For more information about our program, please reach out to us today at (855) 778-8668.
